


It's Not Being Together, It's Just Following the Rules

by Mantinas



Category: Gravity Falls
Genre: Based on a Fleetwood Mac Song, Bill doesn't have all of his power, Billdip is almost a universal constant, Demon Tad Strange, Everyone is noticing Dipper and Bill's attraction to one another, Human Bill Cipher, I hope Billford shippers can take a joke, M/M, Not beta read; we die like men, Older Dipper Pines, Older Mabel Pines, References said Fleetwood Mac song, Tad Narrates This, Tad seems to like Mabel
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-02-16
Updated: 2021-02-16
Packaged: 2021-03-18 06:47:01
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,463
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29485476
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Mantinas/pseuds/Mantinas
Summary: Everyone starts to notice Bill and Dipper seem to be falling for one another. Narrated by Tad Strange.
Relationships: Bill Cipher/Dipper Pines
Comments: 6
Kudos: 27





	It's Not Being Together, It's Just Following the Rules

**Author's Note:**

> I do not own Gravity Falls nor the song "Destiny Rules". I am merely borrowing these for fun not profit! Billford shippers...I hope you can take a joke.

Unsurprisingly, Mabel is the first to notice. They are both twenty taking the summer break from college to spend time at the Shack. Now, strange things happen in Gravity Falls, but leave it to her brother some years back to accidentally grasp Bill’s out stretched hand to unleash the dream demon.

However, what they really got was a handsome blonde boy around their age. And right now, as she elbows Candy and Grenda, said blonde is _actually laughing_ with her brother at the cash register! But forget that miracle! 

No, look closer at Bill! There! THERE! She whisper shouted while flailing her arms about like those tube men in front of car dealerships.

Ah, well. People have seen Bill smile…It is wide, toothy, psychotic with a full shaker of mischief. But this was not that. No, this was gentle, calm. Like the sunny, puddle filled, and rainbow having happy world after the storm moves on. 

Candy points, hand shaking, both girls look and see her eyes have gotten bigger and sparkly.

OH MY GLITTER! DIPDOP WAS SMILING BACK….AND ARE HIS EYELIDS AT HALF MAST?!

All three jaws dropped to the floor before loud squeals erupted from them.

Dipper rolled his eyes but sighed good naturedly. “You think a new type of glitter was discovered?”

Bill eyed them with an intensity of a car salesman who clearly sees the glaring imperfections in the lemon he was trying to sell. “Nah, I think some new boy band posted photos of themselves in swimwear.”

Dipper put his pen to his lips in faux thought. “Why Holmes, I believe you may be on to something.”

Bill snorted and shoved the man good naturedly.

Now, I know you’re expecting a long, drawn out plan of sheer perfection that even Cupid would weep in awe and despair as Mabel got the two men together perfectly while he has failed. BUT YOU’D BE WRONG! Nope, something always seemed to be blocking her efforts. Yes, Mabel, who made a GOD **_QUIT_** and tore the sky apart from sheer power of imagination! Confounded lizard! If it was you, how dare you deny…Eh hem…Her plans simply seemed to back fire.

Like Operation S’Mores!(Mabel insisted that the exclamation mark was necessary) Wherein Mabel declared that at dusk they all were to go out into a clearing in the woods and make s’mores! But oh, only Bill and Dipper would arrive and at the right time Robbie(who owed her a favor) was to play some romantic chords as the couple made the snack. However, the Gnomes were about and attacked them. The snack components and Mabel were stollen. Dipper had to save Mabel AND the Gnomes from Bill who was simply fed up with their existence.

And what of her targets throughout all this?!

They spent their summer spending time together and with the rest of the inhabitants of The Mystery Hack, and townsfolk. Though Dipper noticed Mabel seemed perplexed by something.

Not going to lie, he wanted to see if he could help her but Bill simply gave him a look. I could describe it, but you see it’s one of those telepathic looks that you make with your best friend, they’re unique in a way…Bill’s looked constipated. And no, I’m not just saying that because of jealousy or anything. But Dipper nodded and never brought it up to his sister(something she was hoping he would do so that maybe one of her plans will work for once!) and all was peachy.

But as is the way of the silly illusion called Time goes, their summer ended. Now here someone gave the poor girl a small bone—The wishbone!—and she made sure they had some space; a slightly difficult thing to do due to her Grunkle Ford.

The two were a ways away from the others to say their good byes. But oh, how Mabel wished she could hear what they are saying. It’s not all that interesting, though. It seemed somber…It ended with a handshake. Bill walked away, despite tolerating the rest of the meat sacks; Dipper, everyone knew, would be counted as his only friend. 

Mabel was deep in thought, working her sleeves up her arms, next summer, she knew she would succeed. But Dipper…

\--- ---

Grunkle Stan was the next. Or maybe technically the first, but figured it was just some weird friendship, but now he knew for sure. Anyway, he saw it, okay? And how could he not? He was a lady killer back in the day! Oh, not that kind…He had a lot of girls he tried to date…Getting my hopes up old man! Oh, hehe…Okay, I’ll let that one go.

I’m not even sure why I bring this up. He did not do anything like Mabel. But…I’ll show you.

Stan and Dipper were the only ones in the gift shop. Stan was counting the day’s earnings while Dipper was tidying the shop. The old conman stopped counting for a second and eyed his grand nephew who was sweeping up a corner of the store. Bill, at this moment, was out on the roof watching the pixies and fairies battle it out in a petty little war they have from time to time—and yes, he was recording it all for Pinetree.

Stanly sighed. “Hey kid, I just wanna say that…I know that the world is more accepting and all, but, no matter what happens; I got your back.”

Dipper smiled. “Thanks Grunkle Stan.”

Stan felt a swell of pride right then.

Stan did notice Mabel’s attempts at meddling. But he did his best at keeping out of that. And as his grandniece and nephew were going to leave, he helped keep Ford at bay.

As the kids left he turned and saw Bill standing behind him. It almost gave him a heart attack…And he DID scream! But Bill simply gave his wide smile and said “Thank you….

\--- ---

Wendy! Yes, Wendy, we can do her part now! What? Did you think she wasn’t apart of any of this? Nah~ I’m just selective about who I mention. You know, because it’s how I want to break this down.

“Okay,” Dipper’s voice came from the tree line and coming closer. “So you’re saying that cutting grilled cheese into triangles was started by you?”

Bill opened his mouth to expand on his claim but was interrupted by a shout of Dipper’s name. They turned to see Wendy hop out of her truck, so of course they stopped talking. Dipper smiled and waved as both he and Bill changed trajectory and walked towards her, meeting half way.

“Hey Dipper, how’s it been, man?” She turned to Bill and gave a head nod.

She did not hate Bill these days. More to do with Dipper’s attitude towards the blonde than any interaction she might have had with him post Weirdmageddion.

Dipper explained how they just met a pack of Chupacabra that were experimenting with territory expansion and seemed friendly enough to answer some questions. Bill interjected that he hoped they would find Gnome to be a delicacy. Dipper actually laughed at that.

Wendy noticed it then. Bill’s eye seemed to change from sharp, golden light that promised painful death and misery to a calm, golden sunset. She snorted acting like she was imagining the genocide of those pests instead of Bill’s little slip. Of course, that did not go unnoticed by Bill…Or Dipper, either, but neither paid any attention to him.

They continued to chat a little more, but we shall leave them for now. Instead, I shall confess that Wendy was apart of a good number of Mabel’s match maker schemes…Yes, even the ill fated Operation S’MORES!—and definitely saw the appeal of these guys being wiped out then.

\--- ---

Hmmm….Who next? To…NO! Not Toby! Little weasel spent the summer covering his awesome sounding sport and sucking face with his no longer cardboard girlfriend. 

Gideon? Now that I think about it…Him and Ghost-Eyes were in a court battle because some people *cough*me*cough* was just weirded out by their ‘friendship’. Oh who am I kidding? I just wanted to screw with the little piggy! AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!! SUFFER FOR YOUR SINS AGAINST MABEL!!

Lazy Susan was oblivious, but sweet with them like she is with most people. Blubs and Durland shared smiles when their paths crossed. Sometimes they’d coo at how cute young love can be.

Robbie was in his own little world with Tambry. The other guys were busy with work but seemed supportive. NO I AM NOT RUNNING OUT OF IDEAS! It’s just that not much happened from the point of view of others. 

Then…There’s Ford. Oh I had wanted to hold off on him. Sadly little man lamenting the fact that he was conned by an even worse conman than his twin! Oh yes, I will bring this up a lot. I will until it sinks in your abysmal, little minds just how stupid—everything, but especially—this is!

Of course, when he overheard Mabel plot out a scheme he was deeply upset. And for ‘good’ reason. Bill betrayed him. Conned him worse than the current suckers his brother was conning right now in the Mystery Shack! Conned! By a triangle! Oh heavens! Blah blah blah…You’ve heard it all before. But frilly lizard help him, neither felt such form of love as eros. Get that out of your minds right now! Eeewww!!!

He waited until Mabel was out with friends and Stanly was out with Soos to make up stupid exhibits to confront his grandnephew.

“Dipper, my boy!” Ford called from the bottom of the steps to the attic. “I need to speak to you!” a beat. “Alone!”

Dipper walked down the stairs with a ‘yes Grunkleford?’

“Not here, to the lab.”

“No,” Dipper pipped up. 

“Called it!” Came from the door behind the younger man.

“GrunkleFord, there is nothing to worry about.”

“Nothing to worry about?!” Ford shouted. “Bill may be human and unable to access most of his magic, but he’s still a manipulative demon!”

Dipper tilted his head forward in a ‘really?’ fashion. Ford did not relent.

“Bill and I can ne…”

Oops! Didn’t catch it in time. Oh, Bill is not going to like this. Well, if he’s already going to be man…

“can never be a thing.”

“Of course not, a rela….What?”

“Bill explained it to me last year. Our destinies are not compatible like that here. Oh we’re together in parallel universes as well as universes far removed from this one, he’s shown me a few of the nicer ones. Bill jokes that we’re almost a universal constant.”

“Lovely,” Ford groaned, you could see him give a mental bottle pour for his other selves ‘for the fallen Fords’. “But Dipper, how can you be sure that he isn’t lying?”

“Why would he need to lie? He’s already been reborn elsewhere and his leftovers up there are already freed from being stone. If anything, wouldn’t he lie and say that we are soulmates or something?”

Ford was about to rebuke him but realized that Dipper had him in this one regard. His smart brain then kicked in, his eyes widened. After he overheard Mabel he then noticed things, himself, of course he would jump to the only logical conclusion. He just had nothing to worry about.

“I’m sorry, Dipper.” Ford began. “H…How does this make you feel?”

“I’m not gunna lie, it hurt in the beginning. That I found someone I connected with in many ways that I just don’t seem to with other people was devastating. Bill even cried with me as he hugged me. Now, now it’s…Okay. I know you guys are now noticing, so there’s no denying that I still have feelings. But we can still be friends. And that’s something. As Bill put it: It’s not being together, it’s just following the rules. No one’s a fool.”

“I know that song.” Ford sighed.

Dipper nodded. “Yeah. He sang it to me.”

Ford is teleported back to the Fearamid and to a piano and a couch made of human skin, which really was comfy…He stopped his train of thought there.

Where as Dipper’s memory of Bill singing was during that aforementioned hug.

“Dipper, I can’t promise that I will ever trust Bill, but I believe you. I…I have faith that you will find someone just as amazing as Bill one day.”

“Probably more mundane in comparison.”

“Nah, you’re too extraordinary for mundane.” He rubbed his six fingered hand against his head.

They left smiling.

\--- ---

Okay then…It seems things are okay. I might as well go to our scheduled revelations arc…Kinda small cause of my mishap, but oh well.

“Thank you for everything, Fez, Sixer. It’s been a gas.”

“What are you talking about?” Stan asked.

“I’m heading out. Going to explore this dimension in a more intimate fashion than I was accustomed.”

“What?” Wendy interjected. “Dude, what about…”

“Pinetree is already aware and has given me his blessing. Not that I need it, but hey, any extra luck is welcome!”

“Your paths aren’t meant to cross again, are they?” Ford asked rhetorically.

Bill shrugged. “Who knows, Sixer.”

Stan looked between his brother and the blonde in confusion and made it clear by groaning about being cryptic and walking towards the Stanmobile. Ford nodded and walked off. Bill smiled and began walking.

\--- ---

Mabel was deep in thought, working her sleeves up her arms, next summer, she knew she would succeed. But Dipper…He began to sing.

_When I see you again, as I always do_

_It appears to me that_

_Destiny rules_

_And the spirits are ruthless with the paths they choose_

_It’s not being together,_

_It’s just following the rules_

_No one’s a fool._

Mabel watched her brother as he started to sing until he finished. His eyes never left hers. She heard that song before, knew what her brother was telling her. She was about to speak, but Dipper raised a hand to stop her.

“We knew what you guys were trying to do, but it’s not going to happen, Mabel. I confessed last year anyway and Bill explained things to me. Without getting too technical, it’s just not in the cards.” 

She looked upon him with a clinical, albeit worried, eye. She saw that he was not upset in any way. She lunged and wrapped her brother up in a hug.

\--- ---

Okay, I think I got away with it! Bill seems to be none the wiser…So I can end this little story. Everyone…Goo

“ _T̶̰̫̫͖͔̭̯̞̃̐͐́̓̈́̏͘A̸̢̡̨̨̮̱͚͍̩̥͉͂̑̈̎͌̅̐D̶̢͍͙̩͇̣̠̮͙̟͕̯̩̙̪͒̍!”_

Oh no…Well, it seems like my mistake has been caught. Whelp, ta-ta for now, readers! I’mouttahere!


End file.
